blog

Each year as a volunteer we are required to post one blog entry to the volunteers website. Mine was due a few weeks ago so I'm posting it here as well. I chose to write about the topic focusing on my challenges at my worksite. Now I kind of wish I decided to write about community instead because since the end of November and into December I feel they are the ones who have really had an impact on my year for the best. But...here it is!


"But I'm Allergic to Football!"

A few weeks ago I just couldn't take it anymore. Every one of the 8th graders was being so horrible that I took away their next P.E. class and gave them a writing assignment instead. They ran around when I asked them to stand still. They got sick of the game they begged me to play and decided to sit down mid class. They then continued to argue with me when I told them they needed to stand up. Where have I gone wrong? I work as hard as I possibly can to give them a great class. I thought I could be the cool young teacher that everybody loved. I could play fun games, teach kids a lot about computers, learn about sports myself and perhaps even work on my farmers tan a bit. Turns out, the only thing which was true about that thought was my ability to work up a good farmers tan.

I spend my time yelling at the students to not run around while we're stretching, to actually run when they are doing laps, to stop talking so I can pick the teams and explain the game being played, and asking them to just TRY to play the game that day. Sometimes I have great days while other day's kids get mad at calls made and tell me that they hate me and want a new coach. The only way I really think you could understand what a day is like is by reading some of the apology letters they h ad to write the day they didn't ahve P.E. I found that these are the only things that really show how students act. Some just made me laugh while others show how the students actually behave.

"Dear Ms. Kupski, I'm sorry for not being respectful, talking back to you and not following your directions. I'm sorry for listening to music really loud with bad language. I'm sorry for not staying on my poly spot and messing aroudn in P.E. and in the computer room. I hope you can forgive me for being rude and disrespectful to you the whole year."

"The rules for computers were to not interrupt. They were to be quiet. Not to fool around. Not to misbehave. I fooled around. I misbehaved. I interrupted the class. I was being very loud. I should not have done those things."

"I will get a better P.E. grade and I will try harder. From now on I will be the best I can be. I am sorry Ms. Kupski. I am so very sorry."

"I"ll try harder to listen to you. Next P.E. class maybe we will have fun if we listen to each other. I am very stubborn though and it is hard for mem to listen to what you have to say. I will try hard not to argue."

"I am deeply sorry for my actions of not listening. I will do better so help me God. This will never happen again so help me God."

"I will strive to be a good student. Sorry that I argue, it's just that you don't really watch and I am too competitive. I want to win every single game."

"Next time, there will not be a next time. I will be the very best I can be in my behavior and my grades. Again, I am truly sorry. I hope we can still be friends."

Each day at St. Patrick's School as P.E. and Computer Teacher is a new challenge for me. I don't know why, but the students feel they have to act as horrible as they possibly can and continuously misbehave before I can be "initiated" into the position. My struggle is attempting to see where I fit in at the school. Sometimes to the students I am "just a volunteer" while other times I am a teacher. I am in charge of a classroom (or parking lot) full of students and I have to spend my time creating lessons and enforcing rules.

Without struggles though, my job would be too easy and I wouldn't have anything to work towards (maybe not actually since I still am pretty clueless when it comes to most sports!). I am thankful though for the kids that really do show me what makes my job enjoyable, whether it be any kindergartner running to come latch onto me at any point in the day, 1st grader Annette screaming across the yard to tell me she think my t-shirt is very pretty today, seeing the kids truly enjoying a game of big base kickball (my all time favorite), a junior high student being appreciative of the fact that I am running the KICS club, or just getting to know each of my 152 students on a more personal level. The teachers have been amazing in helping me whenever possible and give me the confidence to keep working as hard as I can. I am also lucky to have a community that continues to motivate me each day to persevere. As this year is quickly progressing I am beginning to see why it is God has me here in San Diego and at St. Patrick's School and I am truly looking foward to everything lies ahead for the remainder of this year.

Kaitlyn Kupski
San Diego
2009-2010